How do I overcome my shyness?

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Shyness in a relationship can become a serious problem. At first you were fascinated by the fact that your partner successfully coped with all the tasks assigned to him seemingly effortlessly. Your other friends also admire your partner. But at some point you noticed how you led more and more of a shadowy existence at the side of your partner. Wherever you went, people seemed to care about your partner but not you. “How do I overcome my shyness?” If this question is a part of your life and partnership, you should read this article.

Shyness can put a strain on life and relationships
Shyness can put a strain on life and relationships

What you need:

  • Willingness to forgive
  • The will to change something
  • Time
  • A partner who supports you on your way

How do you overcome your insecurity?

  • Shyness often has its origins in the past. Perhaps your parents convinced you that you “have two left hands”. It is also conceivable that even then you were constantly in the shadow of your siblings or these were preferred by your parents for some reason. It could of course also be that you had a teacher who exposed you in front of the whole class or that you were always left in physical education class when the teams were put together.
  • All of these points can be the cause of your shyness. But you should know that this does not have to be permanent. So there is an answer to the question: "How do I overcome my shyness"?
  • The first step in overcoming shyness would be to choose to stop letting your negative past experiences dominate you. No matter how this went, it is wrong to believe that because of this, shyness will accompany the rest of your life.
  • The second step in overcoming shyness is to forgive the people who caused it. Unfortunately, the term “forgiveness” is often associated with emotions. But this is wrong. Forgiveness is a conscious decision that no one can make for you, but it is an important key to the question "How do I overcome my shyness".
  • At this point it should be mentioned that forgiveness has nothing to do with weakness. Rather, forgiveness is an act of maturity and personal greatness.
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As of today, shyness is a thing of the past

  • Say war on shyness. Separate yourself from negative statements or negative experiences. No longer describe yourself as shy, but rather as brave and strong. In the beginning this will be difficult for you, after all you have described yourself as small and inferior for years. Do not give up. Overcoming shyness is a process that takes time.
  • The next practical step in helping you overcome shyness is to make a list of all of your merits. This list could be headed: "These are the reasons I am attractive and lovable."
  • Take your time creating this list. Don't stop until this list has eight to ten positive traits.

Overcoming shyness - this is how the partner can help

  • Of course, your partner can also help you overcome shyness. Mutual encouragement should be an important element in your partnership. So ask your partner to make a list as well. The headline of this list could read: “What I really appreciate about you ...” If you look at both lists over and over again, you will see that you are getting stronger and more confident.
  • If you want, you can ask your partner to tell you about character traits that he particularly appreciates in you during the course of the day by text message or on the phone. Or what would you think of finding an email from your partner with the following content: "What I appreciate about you is that you are always on time."
  • At first glance, these points seem insignificant. But they are extremely important in your fight against shyness.

If you follow the steps outlined in this article, “How do I overcome my shyness” will soon be a thing of the past. The steps outlined here can not only strengthen and deepen your partnership, but also you.

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