"She never loved me"
In the end, you had to hear that it wasn't about love at all? Or did you come to the conclusion that your ex-partner never loved you? Do not despair, because you are currently in an exceptional situation. Now you will learn why such a sentence is a single lie.
Most of the time in the separation phase, the realization "She never loved me" matures. And you will immediately think of several arguments to back up your point of view. Unfortunately, you are unable to objectively assess the past.
What is love anyway?
- With the task of "love"To describe the truth of your statement is already at the end. Because for generations people have had grandiose thoughts about what love is - and what is not. If you can answer this question so clearly, you have found the Philosopher's Stone. Then by marketing your knowledge you will at least become a millionaire.
- "Love" is understood differently and felt differently by everyone. This results from the fact that a person is not "finished" with his birth, but only becomes a complete person through his human experience. With the experience people also learn to feel and to evaluate these feelings for themselves. Since everyone has different experiences, the evaluation is also different. We all have the same blueprint with our genes - but this is only the shell, which only becomes perfect through social experiences and makes us individuals.
- Love is defined either as a feeling for which one would then not be responsible - one cannot be held responsible for feelings. Or love is seen as a conscious decision - to do this you have to want to love a person and then put it into practice.
Were you really never loved?
- Since love is described and experienced very differently by different people, there is only one way to find out whether a person loves: He has to say it. Because only every person can say for himself what he feels as love.
- The statement of never having been loved would apply to the entire time of the relationship relate. Often it is only the memory of the last (separation) time that is in the foreground in the memory.
- If you come to the realization that, contrary to your assumption, someone did not love you, this does not change the subjectively experienced past and the times that you spent together to have. Had you not been comfortable in this relationship, you would have ended this relationship. The feelings you felt yourself were not fake. You really experienced that.
- Think about what kept you in this relationship and what your partner kept in the relationship. How did you and your partner benefit from the relationship? Try to shed light on the moments in your memory that were the "highlights" of your time together.
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Watch yourself
- Try to get out of your body once. Sit down next to you and try to be a good friend to judge your own situation. What would you say to yourself if you were not yourself but a friend who wanted to help?
- In a separation phase, people tend to emphasize the negative aspects of the relationship and ignore the positive aspects. This is also good and right because it helps accept the end of the relationship. And then the train of thought "She never loved me" can come up.
- But comfort yourself: over the next few months, your view of things is likely to be reversed. People tend to glorify the past and trivialize the negative experiences from the past. And this will be no different with you and your ended relationship.
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